I have officially come across the most depressing quote ever:
"If you are not in fashion, you are nobody." Lord Chesterfield
This means that my identity is linked to (a) being fashionable and (b) what others think of me.
That is so sad, especially as you get older. Yes, ther are always some older people that stay on top of fashion and dress stylishly, but for most, there is not a lot that they like or can wear. I have reached that point in my life, where everything I see in the shops is either boring or there just is nothing I like. Often things also don't fit me any more.
So, the older we get, the more we bocome nobodies and fade away from a society seriously obsessed with "the new". We should celebrate age like real milestones, like we do for children as they grow up. Treat age as a rite of passage, instead of casting the elderly to the side. We are commanded by God to care for the elderly and if the Pharisees were reprimanded for they treatment of their parents (read MArk 7:8-13), then what about us?
My identity is NEVER liked to something as transient as people's opinion or fashion. It is linked to what God thinks of me and how much I have grabbed hold of that. It is linked to contentment with who I have become and who I want to be.
Showing posts with label identity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label identity. Show all posts
Monday, November 17, 2014
Friday, February 12, 2010
Subcultures Part II
So, when we become the "freaks", what is it that lets us identify with them? Is it their acceptance of us, is it our need to belong somewhere, or is it our rebellion against the constructs of society and specifically our rebellion against everything our parents stood for?
Whatever it is, whom we associate with, that is where we find our identity. This is an over-simplification, since I can put on many masks for different occasions, or as the mood strikes and identify with different groups of people.
What, then, is our identity? It's what the Bible would call our "heart". It's our centre, our deepest sense of who we are. Our problem arises out of looking for exterior things to define us - our wealth, our jobs, our clothes, our hair colour, our tattoos, our piercings, our friends, our car etc. When we find our identity here, we are in trouble, because all these things are transitory. We can also go the other extreme and say we will then find ourselves from within, forgetting that we are just as transitory as the rest. Our identity therefore needs to be found in something that is transcendent, and not part of this world. There is only one place where we can find this and that is in the arms of Jesus, who gives us an identity of sons and daughters of the living God.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Subcultures Part I
Name the subcultures:
Everyone can name them: Goth, Rasta, Punk, Hippie, Grunge, ..... And like everyone, we can pick a number of them out in a crowd. We might not be able to recognise the fine nuances of the sub-subcultures, but in general we either know "Don't mess with these guys", or "these guys are harmless".
Each subculture has their drugs. Either physical powders, pills, liquids or herbs. But drugs can also be emotional and psychological. Emotional dependency is a drug which gets administered by a manipulator and the manipulated lap it up.
The psychological / emotional side is the worst, since it often comes in the form of depression. Some people, when they are depressed manipulate others, because even power can be a drug. Others, in their depression withdraw because they think that nobody cares. Self-pity can be a drug as well. So, let's talk about depression.....
The greatest story of depression (at least he had every right to be) is the story of Job. In a nutshell: He had everything going for him. He was wealthy, he had sons and daughters and he was respected in the community, because he feared God and brought the desired sacrifices (and then some) to atone for any sin he may have (even unwittingly) committed.
Then in one day he loses his livestock (all of it), his servants got killed, his sons and daughters get killed in a freak storm, when the house where they were partying got blown down. As if that was not enough, he develops a terrible skin disease and becomes an outcast and his wife utters the famous words: "curse God and die". His friends hear of his predicament and are so struck, they cannot speak for three days, but then when they do they accuse him of having sinned and he deserves this treatment from God, which he denies, since he has brought all the sacrifices that were required.
It's this just it? When things go well we praise and thank God, and when things go bad we curse him, as if it is his fault that we are suffering. If the story of Job is not depressing, I don't know what is. Job had every right to wallow in self-pity, yet he insists that "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." THAT is faith in a God who is in control and who knows what is going on. Job knew he had done everything in his power to be right with God.
The story turns out better than the beginning, with Job receiving twice as much as he had before, including seven sons and three daughters. He also was blessed with a long life (140 years) and could see his children's children to the fourth generation.
What does this have to do with fashion?
Fashion, by it's nature wants us to feel good about ourselves, and even if we don't, the promise is to at least look good as if we are ok. There are several ways in which the fashion industry capitalises on our need to feel good. I'm sure that as a woman we are drawn by the promises, where men get drawn by the visual. It is therefore no wonder that when women go through a slump, they go shopping. The promise is "buy what makes you feel good", "forget about your problems", "Look for happiness somewhere else." "I (fashion) can make you happy - for a while". All of these promises are empty, because they are fleeting. What is lasting is who we are and who we have to live with for the rest of our days.
There is a lasting joy that comes from a knowledge of being right with God, of having someone else in control who is stronger than I, especially when I don't feel like myself or feel like giving up, or when I feel like an outcast. This lasting joy comes from the knowledge of being loved beyond what I can imagine, for who I am and who will lift me up and give me hope that is eternal.
Everyone can name them: Goth, Rasta, Punk, Hippie, Grunge, ..... And like everyone, we can pick a number of them out in a crowd. We might not be able to recognise the fine nuances of the sub-subcultures, but in general we either know "Don't mess with these guys", or "these guys are harmless".
Each subculture has their drugs. Either physical powders, pills, liquids or herbs. But drugs can also be emotional and psychological. Emotional dependency is a drug which gets administered by a manipulator and the manipulated lap it up.
The psychological / emotional side is the worst, since it often comes in the form of depression. Some people, when they are depressed manipulate others, because even power can be a drug. Others, in their depression withdraw because they think that nobody cares. Self-pity can be a drug as well. So, let's talk about depression.....
The greatest story of depression (at least he had every right to be) is the story of Job. In a nutshell: He had everything going for him. He was wealthy, he had sons and daughters and he was respected in the community, because he feared God and brought the desired sacrifices (and then some) to atone for any sin he may have (even unwittingly) committed.
Then in one day he loses his livestock (all of it), his servants got killed, his sons and daughters get killed in a freak storm, when the house where they were partying got blown down. As if that was not enough, he develops a terrible skin disease and becomes an outcast and his wife utters the famous words: "curse God and die". His friends hear of his predicament and are so struck, they cannot speak for three days, but then when they do they accuse him of having sinned and he deserves this treatment from God, which he denies, since he has brought all the sacrifices that were required.
It's this just it? When things go well we praise and thank God, and when things go bad we curse him, as if it is his fault that we are suffering. If the story of Job is not depressing, I don't know what is. Job had every right to wallow in self-pity, yet he insists that "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." THAT is faith in a God who is in control and who knows what is going on. Job knew he had done everything in his power to be right with God.
The story turns out better than the beginning, with Job receiving twice as much as he had before, including seven sons and three daughters. He also was blessed with a long life (140 years) and could see his children's children to the fourth generation.
What does this have to do with fashion?
Fashion, by it's nature wants us to feel good about ourselves, and even if we don't, the promise is to at least look good as if we are ok. There are several ways in which the fashion industry capitalises on our need to feel good. I'm sure that as a woman we are drawn by the promises, where men get drawn by the visual. It is therefore no wonder that when women go through a slump, they go shopping. The promise is "buy what makes you feel good", "forget about your problems", "Look for happiness somewhere else." "I (fashion) can make you happy - for a while". All of these promises are empty, because they are fleeting. What is lasting is who we are and who we have to live with for the rest of our days.
There is a lasting joy that comes from a knowledge of being right with God, of having someone else in control who is stronger than I, especially when I don't feel like myself or feel like giving up, or when I feel like an outcast. This lasting joy comes from the knowledge of being loved beyond what I can imagine, for who I am and who will lift me up and give me hope that is eternal.
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